One of the biggest things about french culture that I wish we had more of here, is men being able to share their emotions more, interact with other men more emotionally and physically sans the "not trying to be gay", and actual conversation.
The aforementioned Thomas was one of the Lill-ians that I met while there. He ended up being tour guide / language coach / friend / event planner. He quickly became part of the friend group I created while there, and his friends became part of it later on as well. Often, to my suprise, I observed him interacting with men and women in ways I would say are different to home. In the month I was there, he sat down to talk to me and others about his emotional state after a breakup, I saw him hug and sit on other men without a care in the world, and even joke about wearing womens clothes like it was nothing. All this was suprising to me because throughout my life here, men would never do these things. No man willinging talks about their emotional state after a breakup with women (let alone women they just met), they don't hug and sit on other men just to say hello or have a conversation, or say they'd be willing to wear womens clothes. This was a welcomed suprise.
And it wasn't only him! At a picnic one day his friends were hosting (around 20 people showed up), I witnessed these same behaviors from other dudes too. Alex, a tall, straight dude, used my gay pride flag fan the entire 4 hours we were out there. Fabian and Thomas wresteled and laid on the ground together talking about who knows what, Eugene and I spoke about his dreams to be an art director and his fears concerning his future. It was almost surreal to not see these men wanting to prove their manliness via sports, their lady conquests or by straight up aggression. While these traits aren't attributes of all American men, I do see them come out a lot, especially at events like a day long picnic.
This experience has definately taught me more about how different genders can interact and freely express themselves. I hope that in the future I can see more events of brotherly love like this, as it was sooo beautiful and heartwarming. I think this can help me in my future with communities in that I will have first hand examples to use as models, and can use it to help people understand gender roles, gender bias' and gender based expectations.
